Vague Stamp Duty

Following on from the success of the banana, I am pleased to report of yet another triumph. I had, for a long time now, thought that the following item was a lost cause. But, on Saturday 13th February it landed in my porch and had yet again a Royal [Mail] addition:
The stamps . They were housed inside an official Royal Mail envelope with a little sticker on it saying "This article has been found loose in the post". Quite nice of them I'd say. However, there is a mild discrepency between the item I posted and the one I received. Yes, as the more astute followers of 'Will it Post?' might have noticed, not only have the book of stamps been ripped open, but there have been a total of three stamps removed. Vandalism! Thievery! and various other 'angry nouns' I care not to mention. Possibly even with the appropriately added exclaimation marks to suggest that I am very very displeased. I immediately grabbed my calculator and started doing 'the math'. I worked out that if I had paid £4.60 for twelve stamps then that would mean that each stamp had cost me "0.3833333333333333333333333333333". Multiply such a number by three and you have £1.15. I should then really, subract from that number the cost of one stamp, since they did send me this lovely envelope. So 1.15 - 0.3833333333333333333333333333333 = 0.76666666666666666666666666666667. The way I figure it - they owe me. But then they did give me a free bag with my banana, so I guess 'it's swings and roundabouts'.

Looking more closely at the envelope,( not too closely though, I might add ) it reveals that the stamps, or at least the envelope was post marked 11th February 2010 at the Birmingham sorting office and says 'Official Vagues Duty' - researching this term supplied me with no answers as to what this means. The eleventh? That's Sixteen days? And that's twelve working days. That's one day for every stamp, that is spooky. Are the 'RM' on to me? Are they trying to send me a coded message of some sort? Is this fate or God? Is their a God?Is God Mail or Fe-mail? Will it Post? Only the success of future posts will secure the fate of this theory and perhaps go further as to answering such questions. Conspiracy theories aside, it's also quite a long time, for something that essentially has twelve First Class Stamps attatched to it, to arrive. By rights, it should've been their top priority. It got me to thinking about its journey and why it took so long. One possibility for delay, could've been where I had posted it. Being that it went through the Birmingham sorting office, with the amount of post going through there and the size my posted item, it could've have easily got lost in some dark corner or down the back of some huge contraption, only to be retreived and assumed to be out of a larger parcel. It doesn't explain why I am missing three stamps though. Perhaps something to do with the 'vague duty'? Possibly the best excuse for a tax or duty that I've ever heard. That said, my item was delivered so once again I must say, well done Royal Mail and thank you.

Book of Stamps

Posted on: 26/1/10

Arrived on: 13/2/10

Time: 10:02

Sorted at: Birmingham B64AA

Will it Post Prediction: Correct